First of all, before I get all recappy, I must say how much I enjoyed last night’s new show on Logo – RuPaul’s Drag Race (AKA "Project Tranny"). The show, like drag itself, is a celebration and a tribute to many “reality” shows that came before it: especially Project Runway and America’s Next Top Model. But isn’t that what drag itself is? – a celebration/spoof/tribute of femininity, divas, and women?
I think ultimately the reason why I liked the show so much was the fact that it is hosted by the great RuPaul. RuPaul is Heidi Klum, Tim Gunn, Nina Garcia and Tyra Banks all rolled into one. She is supportive of the Dragtestants – and above all, she is HYSTERICAL, and doesn't take herself too seriously. To me, the contestants are simply supporting actresses and RuPaul is the star of RuPaul’s Drag Race. And that’s just fine with me.
One by one, the Dragtestants enter their version of the Project Runway workroom last night. Here is a list of the girls, in order of appearance:
1. Shannel. Boy name: Bryan. Hometown: Las Vegas. Has had a drag show in a Vegas nightclub for six years. She is a showgirl and is wearing the drag version of assless chaps.
2. Nina Flowers. Boy name: Jorge Flores. Hometown: Denver (originally from Puerto Rico). Doesn’t consider herself a female impersonator – has a very androgynous look. Nina is covered in tattoos, and looks extremely butch as a boy. One of three Papis on the show.
3. Rebecca Glasscock. Boy name: Javier. Hometown: Ft. Lauderdale. “Just a small-town girl” who claims to not have had any work done – despite the puffy lips and slim nose. As a boy, he is CUTE. Gets creeped out by Tammie Brown (see below), who looks like a Serial Killer and keeps winking at him.
4. Ongina. Boy name: Ryan. Hometown: Los Angeles. Doesn’t wear wigs, padding, and doesn’t “tuck”. Her name comes from her middle name, “ONG”, and her desire for a vag-INA.
5. Victoria “Pork Chop” Parker. Boy name: Victor. Hometown: Raleigh, NC. She is the oldest Dragtestant (39) and the largest.
6. Akashia. Boy name: Eric. Hometown: Cleveland, OH. “If I was a boy, I’d be a stripper or a slut” (which is what I would be if I had a 32-inch waist). Akashia is “the bitch” of the group.
7. Tammie Brown. Boy name: Keith. Looks like a cross between Lucy Ricardo and Lizzie Borden. I would describe her look as 50’s Serial-Killer Chic.
8. Jade. Boy name: David. Hometown: Chicago. David is the cutest boy there (aye Papi!) and wants to show off his talents as a dancer.
9. Bebe Zahara Benet. Hometown: Minneapolis (originally from West Africa). She brings an “international influence” to the competition.
After they have all gathered and double air-kissed, RuPaul enters and greets the Dragtestants. They are all truly in awe of the drag superstar – who paved the way for many of these younger drag performers.
Ru introduces this week Guest Judge – hot Papi photographer Mike Ruiz. Mike is a friend of RuPaul’s (see them below), and wears a tank top like Ru wears a wig – fiercely.
The Dragtestants will be taking part in a photo shoot, the outcome of which will help determine the girl’s final score for this episode. The girls will be photographed doing a “car wash” scene, complete with two shirtless hunks, a couple of sponges, and at least one long wet hose.
During the soaking-wet mayhem, the best thing was RuPaul’s encouraging commentary to the girls:
“That’s a DIRTY car!”
“I’m gonna write you a ticket!”
“Scrub him down, he’s dirty!”
And my favorite: “This ain’t no truck stop, honey!”
After the girls get soaked, they all return to the dressing room and get out of their makeup and drag clothes. Everyone is surprised that Nina Flowers is covered in tattoos, and Akashia says she could “be a lesbian” with Jade – who is a cute Papi as a boy.
RuPaul re-enters and tells the girls what their challenge will be. This week’s theme will be “Drag on a Dime”. The Dragtestants will have to create a signature look using only hand-me-down clothing and Dollar Store items.
After hearing this news, some of the girls look like they just spent hours putting on girdles, panties, hose, thigh-slimmers, etc. – and then figured out they had to take a crap. They were NOT loving this idea. Especially our Vegas Showgirl (Shannel) – who brought a $25,000 wardrobe with her – and Pork Chop, who has never sewn anything more than a button in her life.
Everyone grabs and growls at the rags and trinkets available and starts to create their garments.
Poor Victoria (AKA Pork Chop). She is a big girl – and has to break down 3 outfits to create one that will fit her. The result is a hot mess. Actually it’s just a mess. We also find out that drag has not always been fun and games for the oldest Dragtestant. Victoria has been shot at, had things thrown at her, and been sent to the emergency room (in drag) just for being a drag queen standing outside a gay bar. This would probably happen again if she showed up to any gay bar wearing that outfit.
RuPaul pays the workroom a visit – and does his best Tim Gunn imitation for a combination assessment/pep talk/counseling session. Again, RuPaul’s commentary is priceless:
“Teena Marie, eat your heart out”
“You feature ‘the back door’ a lot, don’t you?”
And my favorite: “You have to use your skills to pay the bills!” Actually, it was probably skillz/billz with a “z”.
Seriously, I was waiting for a “You better MAKE IT WORK” – but that never came. On her way out the door, RuPaul told the ladies she would see them tomorrow on the main stage and gave her final words of advice:
“Don’t fuck it up!”. Carry on…
The next day, the Dragtestants have 1 ½ hours to get into drag – and then it’s time for the show.
On the runway, RuPaul makes a GRAND entrance and introduces the permanent judges: Fashion Journalist Merle Ginsberg and Project Runway designer Santino Rice. This weeks Guest Judges are hottie Mike Ruiz and fashion legend Bob Mackie. Yes bitches – the same Bob Mackie who designed this…
And this…
Did I mention how much I’m loving this show??
Anywhoo, it’s time for the runway show. The girls walk their garments down the runway – and RuPaul provides commentary. This is what they should let Michael Kors do on Project Runway. Can you imagine if Kors screamed “She’s pooping fabric!!” or “That crotch is insane!” DURING the runway show?!? Now that would be good television.
When all is said and done, Jade, Shannel, Bebe and Serial Killer Tammie are safe. Ongina and Nina Flowers are in the top, and Rebecca, Victoria Parker, and Akashia are on the bottom.
The judges talk to the five remaining girls. Merle is cute and funny – saying that “Ongina” sounds like a heart attack combined with a yeast infection. But Santino tries a little too hard to be a bitchy Nina Garcia (which is funny, since he fought with Nina when he was on Project Runway). Santino even tells Akashia that her outfit made her look like she gave “$20 handjobs”. For the record, Akashia charges only $15 for a handjob – and if you buy four she’ll give you one free.
Nina and her androgynous look win first place – so she and Ongina (who I keep wanting to call “Orangina”) are safe.
After dissing Rebecca Glasscock’s nose job (which she claims she didn’t have) the judges tell her that she is safe. This leaves big girl Victoria ‘Pork Chop’ Parker and handjob whore Akashia.
Again, it is RuPaul’s turn to shine. “I’ve consulted with the judges, my lawyer and housekeeper”, she says – but RuPaul will make the final decision. She tells the two bottom bitches they will have to “lip-synch for your life!” to Ru’s hit “Supermodel”.
“Good luck, and don’t fuck it up”, RuPaul adds. And the girls get busy.
Akashia kicks ass and serves it up on a silver platter. Pork Chop, on the other hand, ends up looking more like apple sauce – tripping and stumbling her way through the song.
RuPaul announces: “Akashia – chantay – you stay”. Then follows up with “Victoria – sashay – AWAY”.
So the big girl, Victoria “Pork Chop” Parker (below), is sent back down south to dodge bullets outside the gay bar. Good luck girl.
I think ultimately the reason why I liked the show so much was the fact that it is hosted by the great RuPaul. RuPaul is Heidi Klum, Tim Gunn, Nina Garcia and Tyra Banks all rolled into one. She is supportive of the Dragtestants – and above all, she is HYSTERICAL, and doesn't take herself too seriously. To me, the contestants are simply supporting actresses and RuPaul is the star of RuPaul’s Drag Race. And that’s just fine with me.
One by one, the Dragtestants enter their version of the Project Runway workroom last night. Here is a list of the girls, in order of appearance:
1. Shannel. Boy name: Bryan. Hometown: Las Vegas. Has had a drag show in a Vegas nightclub for six years. She is a showgirl and is wearing the drag version of assless chaps.
2. Nina Flowers. Boy name: Jorge Flores. Hometown: Denver (originally from Puerto Rico). Doesn’t consider herself a female impersonator – has a very androgynous look. Nina is covered in tattoos, and looks extremely butch as a boy. One of three Papis on the show.
3. Rebecca Glasscock. Boy name: Javier. Hometown: Ft. Lauderdale. “Just a small-town girl” who claims to not have had any work done – despite the puffy lips and slim nose. As a boy, he is CUTE. Gets creeped out by Tammie Brown (see below), who looks like a Serial Killer and keeps winking at him.
4. Ongina. Boy name: Ryan. Hometown: Los Angeles. Doesn’t wear wigs, padding, and doesn’t “tuck”. Her name comes from her middle name, “ONG”, and her desire for a vag-INA.
5. Victoria “Pork Chop” Parker. Boy name: Victor. Hometown: Raleigh, NC. She is the oldest Dragtestant (39) and the largest.
6. Akashia. Boy name: Eric. Hometown: Cleveland, OH. “If I was a boy, I’d be a stripper or a slut” (which is what I would be if I had a 32-inch waist). Akashia is “the bitch” of the group.
7. Tammie Brown. Boy name: Keith. Looks like a cross between Lucy Ricardo and Lizzie Borden. I would describe her look as 50’s Serial-Killer Chic.
8. Jade. Boy name: David. Hometown: Chicago. David is the cutest boy there (aye Papi!) and wants to show off his talents as a dancer.
9. Bebe Zahara Benet. Hometown: Minneapolis (originally from West Africa). She brings an “international influence” to the competition.
After they have all gathered and double air-kissed, RuPaul enters and greets the Dragtestants. They are all truly in awe of the drag superstar – who paved the way for many of these younger drag performers.
Ru introduces this week Guest Judge – hot Papi photographer Mike Ruiz. Mike is a friend of RuPaul’s (see them below), and wears a tank top like Ru wears a wig – fiercely.
The Dragtestants will be taking part in a photo shoot, the outcome of which will help determine the girl’s final score for this episode. The girls will be photographed doing a “car wash” scene, complete with two shirtless hunks, a couple of sponges, and at least one long wet hose.
During the soaking-wet mayhem, the best thing was RuPaul’s encouraging commentary to the girls:
“That’s a DIRTY car!”
“I’m gonna write you a ticket!”
“Scrub him down, he’s dirty!”
And my favorite: “This ain’t no truck stop, honey!”
After the girls get soaked, they all return to the dressing room and get out of their makeup and drag clothes. Everyone is surprised that Nina Flowers is covered in tattoos, and Akashia says she could “be a lesbian” with Jade – who is a cute Papi as a boy.
RuPaul re-enters and tells the girls what their challenge will be. This week’s theme will be “Drag on a Dime”. The Dragtestants will have to create a signature look using only hand-me-down clothing and Dollar Store items.
After hearing this news, some of the girls look like they just spent hours putting on girdles, panties, hose, thigh-slimmers, etc. – and then figured out they had to take a crap. They were NOT loving this idea. Especially our Vegas Showgirl (Shannel) – who brought a $25,000 wardrobe with her – and Pork Chop, who has never sewn anything more than a button in her life.
Everyone grabs and growls at the rags and trinkets available and starts to create their garments.
Poor Victoria (AKA Pork Chop). She is a big girl – and has to break down 3 outfits to create one that will fit her. The result is a hot mess. Actually it’s just a mess. We also find out that drag has not always been fun and games for the oldest Dragtestant. Victoria has been shot at, had things thrown at her, and been sent to the emergency room (in drag) just for being a drag queen standing outside a gay bar. This would probably happen again if she showed up to any gay bar wearing that outfit.
RuPaul pays the workroom a visit – and does his best Tim Gunn imitation for a combination assessment/pep talk/counseling session. Again, RuPaul’s commentary is priceless:
“Teena Marie, eat your heart out”
“You feature ‘the back door’ a lot, don’t you?”
And my favorite: “You have to use your skills to pay the bills!” Actually, it was probably skillz/billz with a “z”.
Seriously, I was waiting for a “You better MAKE IT WORK” – but that never came. On her way out the door, RuPaul told the ladies she would see them tomorrow on the main stage and gave her final words of advice:
“Don’t fuck it up!”. Carry on…
The next day, the Dragtestants have 1 ½ hours to get into drag – and then it’s time for the show.
On the runway, RuPaul makes a GRAND entrance and introduces the permanent judges: Fashion Journalist Merle Ginsberg and Project Runway designer Santino Rice. This weeks Guest Judges are hottie Mike Ruiz and fashion legend Bob Mackie. Yes bitches – the same Bob Mackie who designed this…
And this…
Did I mention how much I’m loving this show??
Anywhoo, it’s time for the runway show. The girls walk their garments down the runway – and RuPaul provides commentary. This is what they should let Michael Kors do on Project Runway. Can you imagine if Kors screamed “She’s pooping fabric!!” or “That crotch is insane!” DURING the runway show?!? Now that would be good television.
When all is said and done, Jade, Shannel, Bebe and Serial Killer Tammie are safe. Ongina and Nina Flowers are in the top, and Rebecca, Victoria Parker, and Akashia are on the bottom.
The judges talk to the five remaining girls. Merle is cute and funny – saying that “Ongina” sounds like a heart attack combined with a yeast infection. But Santino tries a little too hard to be a bitchy Nina Garcia (which is funny, since he fought with Nina when he was on Project Runway). Santino even tells Akashia that her outfit made her look like she gave “$20 handjobs”. For the record, Akashia charges only $15 for a handjob – and if you buy four she’ll give you one free.
Nina and her androgynous look win first place – so she and Ongina (who I keep wanting to call “Orangina”) are safe.
After dissing Rebecca Glasscock’s nose job (which she claims she didn’t have) the judges tell her that she is safe. This leaves big girl Victoria ‘Pork Chop’ Parker and handjob whore Akashia.
Again, it is RuPaul’s turn to shine. “I’ve consulted with the judges, my lawyer and housekeeper”, she says – but RuPaul will make the final decision. She tells the two bottom bitches they will have to “lip-synch for your life!” to Ru’s hit “Supermodel”.
“Good luck, and don’t fuck it up”, RuPaul adds. And the girls get busy.
Akashia kicks ass and serves it up on a silver platter. Pork Chop, on the other hand, ends up looking more like apple sauce – tripping and stumbling her way through the song.
RuPaul announces: “Akashia – chantay – you stay”. Then follows up with “Victoria – sashay – AWAY”.
So the big girl, Victoria “Pork Chop” Parker (below), is sent back down south to dodge bullets outside the gay bar. Good luck girl.
FYI: I am not alone in my praise of the show. Queerty said it finally gives us a reason to watch Logo, and our out Dust Bunny Drag Diva herself – Miss Ginger Grant – gave it high marks. However, a friend of mine who really knows her reality TV emailed me last night saying she HATED it. How did YOU all feel?
Remember, you can watch the entire episode online – go HERE – and then let me know what you think.
Remember, you can watch the entire episode online – go HERE – and then let me know what you think.
