FYI – I did NOT write a recap of last night’s Finale of Top Chef. First of all, making the last episode of any reality show sound funny is next to impossible, unless Christian “Mango” Siriano happens to be competing. The contestants are always concentrating on winning and are NOT trying to entertain – so finding bits and pieces of funny crap to write about is really difficult.
Secondly, I knew I had a lot of real-life work stuff to do today – so I wouldn’t have a lot of time for writing. And finally, I have had a case of the blues lately – and I just didn’t fucking feel like it.
So, now that the excuses are out of the way – I want to say how disappointed I was in last night’s outcome. Hosea?? Seriously??? No-balls Amish Boy??!!??
As Amuse-Biatch NOTED, Hosea's win was obviously the reason why Bravo felt the need to release a personal APOLOGY regarding Hosea's slurp-and-tickle episode with Leah. The statement was released right about the time the winner was chosen – so this makes sense. Call it “Early Damage Control”. And did you notice the kiss-on-the-lips between Leah and the Hose after he won? Ewwwwwwwww.
And for any of you who still think that Stefan is evil – get over it. Did you see him trying to comfort Carla? It was sweet and touching and from-the-heart. And anyone who can work with Marcel without shoving his face into hot oil must have some good in him somewhere.
Speaking of Carla – I KNEW when she started listening to Casey that it wasn’t going to go well. I truly believe that if Carla would have listened to her “Spirit Guides” instead, she could have won it all. Hootie Hoo, dear Carla ... Hootie Hoo...
And file this under “Gross” – Toby Young. I thought we were done with his smug British ass. Dust Bunny Kayce REPORTS that Toby is trying to return next season. DO NOT WANT! And I think it’s pretty obvious that Tom Colicchio feels the same way I do.
One last thing – Gail and her Boobies are just too fabulous for words. When she rolled her eyes at Rocco DiSpirito, my blues momentarily went away. And I just wanted her to stand up at Judges Table, walk over to Toby, and beat him with her Boobies. THAT would have been worth recapping.
Check out MinxEats for a proper (and hilarious) recap. And feel free to discuss last night’s episode in the comments section. Peace, bitches.
Secondly, I knew I had a lot of real-life work stuff to do today – so I wouldn’t have a lot of time for writing. And finally, I have had a case of the blues lately – and I just didn’t fucking feel like it.
So, now that the excuses are out of the way – I want to say how disappointed I was in last night’s outcome. Hosea?? Seriously??? No-balls Amish Boy??!!??
As Amuse-Biatch NOTED, Hosea's win was obviously the reason why Bravo felt the need to release a personal APOLOGY regarding Hosea's slurp-and-tickle episode with Leah. The statement was released right about the time the winner was chosen – so this makes sense. Call it “Early Damage Control”. And did you notice the kiss-on-the-lips between Leah and the Hose after he won? Ewwwwwwwww.
And for any of you who still think that Stefan is evil – get over it. Did you see him trying to comfort Carla? It was sweet and touching and from-the-heart. And anyone who can work with Marcel without shoving his face into hot oil must have some good in him somewhere.
Speaking of Carla – I KNEW when she started listening to Casey that it wasn’t going to go well. I truly believe that if Carla would have listened to her “Spirit Guides” instead, she could have won it all. Hootie Hoo, dear Carla ... Hootie Hoo...
And file this under “Gross” – Toby Young. I thought we were done with his smug British ass. Dust Bunny Kayce REPORTS that Toby is trying to return next season. DO NOT WANT! And I think it’s pretty obvious that Tom Colicchio feels the same way I do.
One last thing – Gail and her Boobies are just too fabulous for words. When she rolled her eyes at Rocco DiSpirito, my blues momentarily went away. And I just wanted her to stand up at Judges Table, walk over to Toby, and beat him with her Boobies. THAT would have been worth recapping.
Check out MinxEats for a proper (and hilarious) recap. And feel free to discuss last night’s episode in the comments section. Peace, bitches.
