By now most of you have seen (or heard about) Carrie Nojeans and her little tiff with Larry King last night (see video above). Basically what happened was that Carrie thought Larry was being "inappropriate" for asking questions ... on the show where he ASKS QUESTIONS for an hour each night. So Carrie took off her microphone and then sat there looking completely ridic. It was, according to Dlisted, a STORM-OFF FAIL!
The twisted Queen behind Dlisted - the brilliant Michael K - thinks Carrie's poor performance last night stems from not having a "Main Gay" in her life:
There's many reasons why Carrie needs a gay in her life, but her STORM OFF FAIL really got to me. If she had a main gay by her side, he would have taught her how to storm off properly thanks to Dynasty and other prime-time soap operas. Carrie just needed to look into the camera and calmly say, "LARRY KING (dramatic pause) I will destroy YOUR (dramatic pause) LIFE." Then she should have flipped her hair, whipped off her mic in one easy swoop, gracefully slid out of her chair, hiked up her titties, thrown one last shank eye into the camera and then strutted off like there's a hard 9-inch peen waiting for her in the wings. END SCENE.
You don't fumble with your mic and awkwardly sit there with a smile like a polite 4-year-old waiting for a juice box. Embarrassing! DO IT BIG, or don't do it all.
And THAT is why I want to be Michael K when I grow up ...
