Paula Deen Is A Straight Up FAH-REEK!!

As much as it pains me to say this, I'd probably lick dairy products off Robert Irvine's abs and ride him like a Cowgirl at the rodeo too, if presented with the opportunity. Well, Paula Deen got her chance to at the South Beach Food & Wine Festival over the weekend - and Miss Thang really went for it, ya'll:

Despite his burly appearance and British military training, I'm sure Mr. Irvine (star of Dinner: Impossible on the Food Network) will never be quite the same. Forget waterboarding, all you need is Paula Deen and a can of Reddi-Wip and she could topple governments.

Quick, someone send her to Libya to meet with Qaddafi...

h/t: Dlisted

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Eva Longoria's Hot Young Piece

Git it, Gurl!! Eva Longoria, 35, is dating Penelope Cruz's brother Eduardo - who is only 22 years-old!

According to Dlisted, Eduardo is in total AMOR because he's already gotten Eva's name tattooed on his arm - after just two months of dating. Girlfriend is obviously doing something right.

Personally, I'd get Eduardo's name tattooed across my butt AND my forehead for just 10 minutes alone with the guy. TEN MINUTES, Papi - that's all I need ...

Mazel Tov !

Neil Patrick Harris and his adorable husband David Burtka are proud fathers!! Congratulations guys.

Source

Calvin Klein Dating 20-Year-Old Model

Fashion icon Calvin Klein, 67, has raided the local Preschool and got himself a Youngin' !  The attractive blond 20-year-old is named "Nick" (last name varies), and the couple has been seen around NYC and in the Hamptons since May.

Gawker did some digging and found out that Nick was a model with a Model Mayhem profile.  A few hours after they posted this information, the Model Mayhem page was deleted.  THEN they discovered that Nick had also been a {{cough, hack, cough}} "movie actor" under a different name. Escándalo!

Read more HERE - and have a Happy Hump Day!!  Because you KNOW Calvin is...

Dear Mel Gibson - Please Shut Up and Go Away

What a disgusting human being - below is Mel Gibson's latest rant directed at his ex-girlfriend.  In the dictionary under "douchenozzle", there should be a picture of Mel Gibson.

UPDATE:  Hear Mel's latest rant HERE (this time he threatens to kill his ex).  Oh, and he also HATES THE GAYS (quelle surpise). What a guy!!

Sad News: Jennifer Saunders Battling Cancer

According to Dlisted, Jennifer Saunders (who celebrated her BIRTHDAY last week) has been battling breast cancer for the last 8 months.  But there is good news: reports say that her cancer is currently in remission.

Hang in there Sweetie-Darling!

You Must Be THIS BIG To Ride Rihanna...

According to Dlisted, Rihanna is a big Size Queen...

RiRi explained, "He has to be good in bed and the size matters. You know what I mean? The inner beauty counts as well, but without a toy it doesn't make it fun."

In other words, you can only stand under her umbrella ella ella eh eh eh if you're hung like a side of beef.

I find this story extremely intriguing because it was recently reported that Rihanna is dating actor Tristan Wilds, 20. Many of you know Tristan from the new 90210 - but to me he will always be the young kid who became a hardened criminal, Michael Lee, from HBO's The Wire.

I guess Mr. Wilds "has what it takes" to date RiRi...

Now's My Chance...

The unbelievably hot Reggie Bush and the extremely untalented Kim Kardashian have broken up - according to Dlisted.


Note to Reggie: I totally don't mind being "The Rebound Ho", but I doubt you could do any pushups with ME on your back ...