It's Mah Birfday!

I wonder how many Weight Watchers points I could consume at Arby's after work tonight? Hmmmm?? ....

No plans for celebrating my 42nd birthday today - because there will be plenty of celebrating over the weekend with Maddie and Ginger. But I AM taking the rest of the day off from blogging. And BTW, if any of you know the whereabouts of Franky G, please send him to my apartment immediately...

Don't forget to watch Top Chef tonight - and look for The Minx's recap sometime tomorrow.

>P, B!

Monday Weigh-In

Ok bunnies - no Monday Weigh-In today. I ate a lot over the weekend with my family in PA - and I knew today's weight wouldn't be pretty. Unfortunately I don't see this weekend being much better, since I'll be having a "weekend with the girls" (Maddie and Ginger).

But I'm not giving up. I will walk as much as possible this week, and log my points over at WeightWatchers.Com. The never-ending urge to constantly eat has gone away, thanks to my antidepressant - so I don't think I will get too far off track.

Speaking of my anti-depressants, I would like to share an email I received recently in response to my recent trials and tribulations involving my depression and my weight. "A" sent me the following:

David,

As a follower of your blog I am always entertained and very often find myself laughing out loud at your comments.

Your recent post, Big Ball of Crazy, however was very inspiring and I want to Thank You for sharing something so personal. I know that something so personal is not an easy thing to share and it's very hard to admit to yourself as well.

I read your post and, like many others, saw so much of myself in it that it was a little frightening LOL. I too have been struggling with depression issues and have recently had a big struggle with my weight during several bouts of bronchitis.

Having retreated into my own little cave I have been wrestling with a way out and whether it was something I even wanted to break out of. Your post helped me realize that this is not something unique to us but is something felt, in varying degrees, by everyone. I determined that I don't want, or need, to continue this downward path.

You have inspired me to do what I can to break this cycle and to help myself.

I look forward to your continuing success and hope to follow in your footsteps. Keep up the good work and inspiring tales. (and the men, of course)

Peace, Bitch!!

Wow. I was absolutely blown away that someone had gotten a little inspiration from what was going on in my life - and decided to try and make things better for herself.

"A" and I have emailed back and forth a few times, and last I heard she had scheduled visits to her Doctor and to a Psychiatrist. Great job - and please keep in touch.

So, I may have gained a few pounds over the weekend, but I haven't given up. Especially since I have so many people, like "A", rooting for me. And I'm rooting for her right back.

XOXOXOXOXO

Fat Talk...

When I entered my weight yesterday on WeightWatchers.com, I had gained so much that they INCREASED the number of daily points I was allowed to have! Your points limit is determined by your weight - so increased weight = increased points. It seems to me that's rewarding failure, but I ain't complaining...

Feeling Better

As some of you guessed, my weekend freakout was about more than just food. Unfortunately, I can't really talk about what all this latest stress stems from. I will say it has nothing to do with me directly - although in time it could affect me.

I am confident the problem can be solved, and I thank you for your well wishes.

Oh, and by the way ... I logged my points yesterday on WeightWatchers.com and stayed within the guidelines. I also did my 2 1/2 mile walk home from work :)

>P, b.

Monday Weigh-In

I had a pretty good week health-wise: I walked home from work every day and did my dance/exercise thing on Saturday and Sunday at my apartment. I did have a few slip-ups on the diet (I caved in and ordered Chinese food once) but I did my best to stay within my Weight Watchers point limit.

My efforts definitely paid off, because I lost 6 pounds! Now keep in mind that I’m still RE-losing the 25 pounds I lost last year (and gained back this year) – but after 2 weeks I’m already halfway there.

My next goal is to get back to the gym…

Monday Weigh-In

Last week I promised you a Monday weigh-in, so here it is...

Exactly one week ago, I tipped the scales at a new record for me. The 25 lbs I had lost last year had been regained – plus a few.

Instead of getting discouraged (like I usually do), I actually took steps to reverse my gaining trend. I started logging my points again at Weightwatchers.com, and I walked home from work twice last week (2 ½ miles).

And on Saturday I did something that had helped me lose 90 pounds a few years ago … I danced.

Yep, you heard me right – I danced. By myself. In my apartment. Alone. I put on one of the Dance channels on AOL Radio, and boogie oogie oogied ‘til I just couldn’t boogie no more. And I forgot how much fun it was.

Bitches – I could sell tickets to that show. You should see me getting my groove on. And it is really good exercise. An hour of walking earns 3 Weight Watchers activity points (basically, 3 extra points you can use to eat later) – but an hour of dancing earns 8 points. And I really do work up a sweat.

And heaven help me if I hear one of the old songs I danced to when I first hit the clubs here in NYC. Like Murk’s “Some Lovin”…




Or The Fog’s “Been A Long Time”…

I’m wiggling here at my desk just thinking about it.

Anywhore, it wasn’t ALL sunshine and light this past week. I keep ordering Chinese delivery when I should be having Lean Cuisine. But at least I got my dumplings steamed (instead of fried) over the weekend. I obviously still have room for improvement.

But, as of today, I have lost 6 pounds from when I started this whole journey last year. Yes, I know at one point I was down 25 lbs, but at least it’s a start. And at least I'm not HEAVIER than I was when I started. I’ll check back in next week and let you know how it’s going.

Friday Weigh-In: EPIC FAIL

How NOT to lose weight:

DON'T go into the kitchen of your restaurant and ask for a big-ass order of onion rings after you tell your blog readers you are going to try and do better. Even if beer-battered onion rings are the most delicious things in the universe.

DON'T repeat the above every single day since last Friday.

DO avoid the gym and any other forms of exercise at all cost.

DO make sure you drink lots of alcohol at night, and have lots of McDonald’s hangover breakfasts in the morning.


Okay, so I have come clean – even though I vowed last week to get back on track, it didn’t happen. Normally I would be suicidal right now, but I’m surprisingly not. I’m actually just hopeful I can do better next week - which may have something to do with our new President and/or THE HAT.

I am also changing my (previously) unspoken rule of not discussing my actual weight – just how much I’ve lost/gained. I tell my Dust Bunnies almost everything – why should this be any different?

I am 5’ 10” tall, and today I weight 264 lbs. And trust me, NONE of that is muscle. It is flab. According to Weight Watchers, my ideal weight should be less than 174 lbs. I am at least 90 lbs. overweight.

On my December 19th Weigh-In, I weighed 252 lbs – making my total weight loss 25 lbs. So if you do the math, that means I weighed 277 lbs. when I joined Weight Watchers on October 17th. As of today, I have gained back half the weight I lost.

I hope to start doing the right thing today. Good or bad, I'll report back in a week.

Friday Weigh-In

I know it's been ages since I weighed in publicly, and you can probably imagine why. I have been doing everything wrong - not logging what I eat with Weight Watchers, ordering Chinese Food almost every night, and not getting any exercise. Of course this only makes me feel worse - which prompts me to eat more, etc.

When I last weighed myself, I had gained 5 pounds. I am certain that I have gained more since then. I didn't have the balls to actually get on the scale this morning to find out exactly how much I have gained.

But one thing I know is - if I do this publicly, on my blog, I am more likely to succeed. The first 25 pounds I lost in the fall was almost totally because I wanted to report good news to all of you. Yes, I know that may sound stupid - but it works for me, so don't give me hell for not doing this for MYSELF. Everything I do, I do it for you. So I will report back to you all in one week and let you know, officially, how I'm doing.

Friday Weigh-In

It has been two weeks since I officially "weighed-in" here on the blog - and these past two weeks happen to include Thanksgiving - my favorite day to pig out. In my entire life I have never lost weight during this two-week period.

Well guess what?!? I actually lost 2 pounds in the past two weeks!!! So my total weight loss is now at 22 pounds. I am patting myself on the back as we speak.

Back To Baby Carrots...

I'm back from Thanksgiving, and I'm happy to report I didn't completely lose control of my diet while in Pennsylvania. I did NOT count my points while there, but I DID buy a bunch of fruit and other Weight Watcher's-friendly foods upon my arrival. So instead eating stuffing and mashed potatoes 100% of the time, I only did it 50% of the time. I consider this a triumph.

Weight-wise, I have gained 4 pounds since my lowest point 1 1/2 weeks ago. Again, a TRIUMPH. I am, as we speak, eating baby carrots and am back to counting points.

This next month will be difficult - it is my busiest time of the year, which makes it difficult to stay on plan. But I have promised to do my best. Wish me luck.

Friday Weigh-In And Thanksgiving Jitters

I have lost my first 20 pounds!, which is three pounds lost since last Friday. I am starting to fit into clothes that I haven’t fit into in ages, which I am extremely happy about. I went to the gym on Wednesday, and walked home on Monday and last night.

I would still like to get to the gym more often, but it is hard to pass up walking because I enjoy it so much. I realize I burn a ton more calories on a Stairmaster, but there is something about walking through this city that I never get tired of. Even when it’s 38 degrees outside.

Next week will be the true test. Thanksgiving is my absolute favorite holiday – no presents, no drama – just show up, pig out, and pass out. I am leaving for Central Pennsylvania on the first Amtrak train on Wednesday morning, and won’t return until Monday afternoon.

In years past the entire long weekend became one big pig-out session, but this year I have vowed to be different. I have told my Dad (who I stay with) not to get the usual “picnic food” – potato and macaroni salad, chicken salad, potato rolls, chips, cold cuts, and various cheeses – that he usually gets before I arrive. I plan on heading to the Giant (our local grocery store) and to the Wal-Mart to pick up Weight Watchers-friendly foods. And yes, I said THE Giant and THE Wal-Mart because that’s how we talk back home.

Thanksgiving Day itself is a different story. I will go to Mama Bunny’s house in the morning and help her prepare the annual feast. And there is NO WAY I will deprive myself of cornbread dressing (stuffing) and giblet gravy. Mama Bunny is from Texas, and our Thanksgiving meal reflects her southern roots. Then later I’ll return to Dad’s house where there will be my Stepmother’s stuffing loaves and turkey sandwiches waiting for me. Needless to say, I won’t be counting my points on that day.

What are your plans for Thanksgiving?...

Friday Weigh-In: Yes I Can!

It was exactly four weeks ago that I joined Weight Watchers and decided to change my eating/exercise habits. And it was exactly four days ago that I wanted to jump off the Brooklyn Bridge after having a bad week.

I am happy to report that I have lost three pounds since Monday! This makes my first month's weight-loss total 17 pounds. I have to admit - even I am impressed.

Now I need to ramp up my exercise. I went to the gym once this week - and hope to go back tonight. Next week I hope to do better.

How did YOU guys do this week?

Manic Monday Weigh-In

I had a HORRIBLE week when it comes to diet/exercise - and I didn't lose any weight. So I stand at 14 pounds lost (in 3 1/2 weeks). This seems like such a small amount of weight for such a long amount of time - when I was doing Atkins I could lose 14 pounds in one week, easily.

On Tuesday (Election Day) I stress-ate all day. On Tuesday night I drank like a fish to celebrate. On Wednesday I hangover ate (McDonald's TWICE - as well as the Chef at my restaurant making me Chicken Salad sandwiches). On Friday I binge ate everything in site, and ordered a cheeseburger and fries at 2:00 am. And last night, in the middle of the night, I woke up and ate the sandwich that I had prepared for today's lunch.

To make matters even worse, my ankles have been KILLING ME - preventing me from walking (you would hurt too if you had to support this lardass). And the icing on the cake was an ingrown toenail that made walking even more painful than it normally is. Therefore, I did not exercise at all this week.

All things considered, I guess I should be happy that I didn't GAIN any weight. I am very frustrated and depressed right now - I don't have my part-time job, and my full-time job is much less lucrative. My roommate is out of work, and I'm not sure how he plans on continuing to pay the rent. I have been hit surprisingly hard by the Prop 8 loss in California - how is it that MY rights are allowed to be put up to a popular vote - and others are not? All of these things make me want to stuff my face and cry - which is pretty much what I've been doing.

I will try and get myself together and weigh in again on Friday.

UPDATE: I just entered my weight onto my WW page, and it turns out I DID gain a pound. Just fucking shoot me...

No Friday Weigh-In This Week

There will be no Friday Weigh-In this week, but I will weigh-in on Monday (my actual Weight Watchers weigh-in day). I am wussing out this week because I ate like a pig on Tuesday and Wednesday - which is TOTALLY Barack Obama's fault.

I will check in with you all regarding my weight/fitness on Monday. Wish me luck.

Friday Weigh-In

It was exactly two weeks ago that I joined Weight Watchers (AKA "The Cult"). At the time, I told you all that I would check in every Friday and let you know how I was doing - and you all could check in as well. Today is my second "Friday Weigh-In".

The Cult also makes you weigh-in once a week - either at a meeting or online. I am an online member, and I picked Mondays to be my official weigh-in day.

These two different weigh-in days have produced an unexpected benefit. It forces me to really watch myself over the weekend, the time that I'm most likely to cheat. And so far it is working.

I was not as good this past week as I was during week one. I had a "special occasion" on Saturday and pigged out at a Barbecue restaurant (biscuits and gravy!!). I also drank this week - which used to be a 3-4 times/week occurrence, but is now down to about 3 times/month. I also can't seem to get into an exercise routine. The only form of exercise I enjoy is walking, but I need to do something a little more intense to help get my metabolism moving.

So, needless to say, I didn't expect much this week. But this morning I was pleasantly surprised - I lost 6 pounds! That is 14 pounds in two weeks!!! I am beyond thrilled, and I'm starting to think The Cult may have a lifetime member.

So - how did YOU do this week?...

Friday Weigh-In

I want to thank all of you for the support you have shown me since I joined Weight Watchers last week. Because this will be an ongoing battle for me, I have decided to do a "Friday Weigh-In" post every week to tell you about my progress. Thanks to Joy for the great idea.

I must say, I was overwhelmed by the positive response from all of you. In fact, long-time Dust Bunny Marker joined Weight Watchers after reading my post - and so did Renee. Renee even coined the term DBAF - "Dust Bunnies Against Flab" - which I think is hilarious.

But they aren't the only DBAF's out there. Joy is watching her diet and increasing her exercise because of diabetic and other health concerns. Jennie (like me) is constantly struggling to eat right - but sometimes hides pizza anyway (PLEASE read her hilarious post HERE ). I have heard from many others who struggle to do the right thing when it comes to diet and exercise. So the Friday Weigh-In is also an opportunity for all of us to check in and tell each other how we are doing in the fight against flab. Us Flabby Bunnies need to stick together.

For our first Friday Weigh-In, I want to provide us with some inspiration. So let me introduce to you my friend (and Dust Bunny) Zombie Mom. Zombie is a former big girl who put aside her self-doubt and poor body image and lost a ton of weight. She did it with Weight Watchers, exercise, determination, and a wonderful spirit. She is now an avid runner (miles and miles each week) and recently completed her first half marathon - congratulations!. Zombie has sent me emails with Weight Watchers tips and general words of encouragement, and for that I am grateful. And she does all of this in spite of the fact that she is busy as hell at work and is raising two of the most perfect little girls you have ever seen. Zombie Mom inspires me every day - and should inspire you also. Read her blog - Purses and Poop - HERE .

As far as MY first week on Weight Watchers goes - I am happy to report that I've lost 8 pounds! I hit a rough patch on Tuesday because of the stress from my event at work, and Wednesday I was just being a hog. But yesterday I got back on track - especially since I was going to do this post today and I didn't want to look like an idiot. See, this "Friday Weigh-In" thing is working already!!

How did YOU do this week?...

Garden Vegetable Soup, Bitches!

I PROMISE this blog will not turn into weight-loss central, but I have to tell you how excited I am to be following the Weight Watchers plan again. It is such a pleasure not to have to eat meat and cheese for every meal, like I did before.

Today I decided to make one of my Weight Watchers faves - Garden Vegetable Soup. It's supposed to be one of those "no points" things you can eat as much as you want of, but I throw in so many vegetables that I always charge myself a point when I eat a bowl.

I went to the excellent Fruit and Vegetable market in my neighborhood and picked up my veggies - along with some other healthy crap to snack on. For the grand total of $8.52, this is what I came home with:

Yes bitches, and I live in Manhattan! I loves me some my veggie market. And YES - I came home and arranged my fruit/veggies in a basket to make a prettier picture for you all. If you ever had any doubts about my homosexuality, that should put them to rest immediately.

Basically I chopped everything up and threw it in a pot with fat-free chicken stock and a little tomato paste. It smells delicious!

Now it's time to eat...

I'm Going To Do Something About It...

I had a LONG blog post written about how depressed I've been, and my resulting destructive behavior with food. And the fact that I am now heavier than I've ever been in my life. And my aching feet, self-loathing, blah, blah, blah...

But I'm not going to post it. The reason why I started writing that post in the first place was to tell everyone that I joined Weight Watchers today. For me, this is a big deal.

When I lost 90 pounds a few years ago, I did it by following the Atkins (low carb) diet. But Atkins is not working for me any more. The limited food choices are too restrictive for me now. And I've been crippled by the fact that if you 'cheat' on Atkins, you've pretty much screwed the pooch for the day. This means that if I had ONE onion ring I ended up thinking "Fuck it - I've already screwed up. Might as well enjoy it!". Then I'd eat a whole bowl of onion rings, followed my a bunch of other horrible crap. I know it's stupid, but it's my Crazy and at least I own it.

Anywhoo, I decided to try something else - so I joined the Weight Watchers online program. I am NOT a meeting person - there is no way I would go to a meeting and be weighed and discuss food. Maybe in the future, but not now. Again - this is MY Crazy. But the online option seemed perfect for me.

I have tried WW before. Actually, back in the day I got my hands on a coworker's books (point guide, etc) and I lost a little weight. But the logs and journals and trying to figure out point values and writing everything down eventually turned me off.

The online program, however, figures everything out for you. It helps you set goals, and has a huge database of point values for various foods. Even restaurant items have been figured out (LORD there are a lot points in a meal at Arby's!) You basically type in what you ate, and the computer tells you how many points you used and how many points you have left.

Weight Watchers is also the only weight loss plan that I've ever known people to lose weight and actually keep it off for years and years. So I'm giving it a shot. I'll keep you posted...

One last thing - at lunchtime I went out to find something to eat, and I was SO EXCITED to be able to buy a pear at the fruit stand. This was not something I could eat under Atkins. It was the best friggin' pear I've ever eaten.