He's Got A Present For You

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The Night Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas,

when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads

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NORAD Tracking Santa LIVE

The North American Aerospace Defense Command (NORAD) is tracking Santa's midnight journey for the 55th year - check out the chubby guy's progress HERE. NORAD, however, refuses to discuss their top secret methods for tracking Santa's trip - but they do note that Santa will not visit kids in Canada or the U.S. until all children are asleep.

Facebook page HERE.

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He Sees You When You're Tweeting

Speaking of Twitter - join me at 10 pm EST for cocktails and stank talk during The Fashion Show: Ultimate Constipation tonight on Bravo.

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OCD Santa

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Happy Holidays !

What a coincidence - here is the Christmas list I sent to Santa this year:

And just to butter Santa up a little bit, I sent him this festive holiday wreath I made out of construction paper, a bit of string, a paper plate and some glue ...

What did YOU ask Santa for this year???

Santa Comes ...

... bearing gifts. Or GIFT.

Have you been naughty or nice?? Either way, Santa's gonna give it to you ...

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Santa Claus ...

... and his Ho Ho Ho's.

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He Knows If You've Been Bad Or Good

Sanda Claus is coming to town...

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♫Condom Claus Is Coming To Town...♫

This Santa, made out of condoms, was recently spotted outside of a restaurant in Thailand. BANGKOK, do be exact. From Towleroad.

You Better Watch Out - You Better Not Cry...

...Santa Perv is coming ... to ... town.

"Remember, darling Amanda, this must remain our little secret"

Hand-check!!